All About the Swag

I admit it.  That was me who cleaned out WH Smith’s stock of Royal Wedding Commemorative Stickers in Heathrow Terminal 5 last Friday.  I mean what’s not to love about Royal Wedding Commemorative Stickers? They’re almost as good as the pope bottle opener and Virgin Mary travel shampoo bottles I bought in Vatican City. (Or were those holy water bottles?  I forget.)

Commemorative stickers aside, I was surprised at how thin on the ground Royal Wedding merchandise was at Heathrow. Other than the stickers all I saw was a very funny My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding spoof book in which Kate and Williams’ heads were super-imposed on a Big Fat Gypsy Wedding party (if you haven’t seen the documentary that inspired this, get a taste here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2XuqGS1fm8) and a tin of Walker’s shortbread with that overused engagement photo on it (you know, the one that Kate’s eyebrow groomer should be fired over). The London Olympics people already managed to get a whole frickin’ shop open in Terminal 5, and their event isn’t even until next year. And their logo looks like it was designed by a cat.

Luckily, Tim the cashier at WH Smith informed me that all the really good merch doesn’t surface until after the actual event. Everyone is waiting for the money shot of the wedding dress (hopefully accessorised with subtly arched brows). Thanks for the tip, Tim. I’m not even mad you forgot to give me half off my buy-one-get-one-half-off books.

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